ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
