I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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