I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Randomize
