look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
