I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
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