I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I don't deserve a penis
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
