yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
