mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
i will never coherently bang her
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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