About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
