I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
COCAINE IS GR8
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Randomize
