What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
