i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I feel like he knows I had a dream about him eating me out in the janitors closet at the holiday party. He's giving me THAT look.
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
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