Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
