What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
Vodka?
Forever.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
