And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
