I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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