4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Randomize
