How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
