Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
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