Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
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