how do flat chested girls get laid?
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Randomize
