I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
