omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
I party with great urgency now.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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