You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
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