If i could tip my vagina, i would.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
