not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
