It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
