I'm drive I can fine osifer
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
