Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
