hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
