you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
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