im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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