ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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