Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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