We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
We had to coat check the pizza.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I just found a bag of teeth...
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
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