no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Im at strip club and am horny
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize
