I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
