Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
