i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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