im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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