Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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