We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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