Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
