OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
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