she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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