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• (415): View more from California

  I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.

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• (212): View more from New York

  You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.

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• (980): View more from North Carolina

  after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape

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• (972): View more from Texas

  You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.

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• (559): View more from California

  So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?

  (1-559): View more from California

  That depends on who this is.

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• (256): View more from Alabama

  Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.

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• (440): View more from Ohio

  Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...

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• (716): View more from New York

  i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)

  (1-803): View more from South Carolina

  Did you watch the carolina game tonight?

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• (515): View more from Iowa

  Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract

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• (406): View more from Montana

  my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....

  (1-406): View more from Montana

  It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.

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