But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
