Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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