His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Randomize
