ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Randomize